[IC Contact]

[devwocean]

You havve reached the personal vvoicemail a Orphaner Dualscar.
Leavve a message.

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[withoutasign]

[You are a silly fish, Dualscar, don't even try to deny it.]

[Signless nods, his grip loosening. This is a sensitive topic, he knows, and it's best to tread lightly.]

Good. I'm... thank you.

[devwocean]

[He can deny it if he wants!

Dualscar isn't really sure how to handle this situation. He feels his words are inadequate, and it's not like him to be wishy-washy, but this is so difficult for him. He tightens his own hold on Signless, his stomach clenching. Is he a traitor, now? How much longer can he convince himself that it's only the unique situation he's in, that it doesn't count in some way because he's in Vatheon and things are different here?]

I hope she doesn't come...for all a our sakes.

[withoutasign]

[Signless nods, and when he answers, his voice is small against Dualscar's chest.]

So do I.

[devwocean]

[Stroke, stroke... he rubs gently at Signless' scalp, trying to soothe him as best he can, though his own stomach is still twisting with anxiety.]

Is there anythin' I can do to help wwith the Darkleer an Psiioniic situation?

[withoutasign]

[Signless can feel the tension radiating off Dualscar, and he reaches up and strokes one fin. After a short time, he moves his head, looking up at the seadweller.]

No, I don't think so. But I'll let you know if I come up with anything.

[He smiles tiredly.]

Thanks for listening.

[devwocean]

[Dualscar manages a wan smile, but it doesn't last long. He nods and cuddles Signless close again.]

I'm alwways ready to listen.

[withoutasign]

Thank you.

[Signless stays quiet after that, stroking Dualscar's fins, lost in thought.]

You know... Psii is my oldest friend, but you're my moirail. I'm not pale for Psii.

[devwocean]

[Dualscar squirms just a bit]

I'm not tryin' to accuse you a anything, but it doesn't look all that different.

[withoutasign]

It is, though.

[Pap pap pap]

I tell you things I don't tell him; I depend on your counsel more.

I just wish the two of you got along better.

[devwocean]

[He starts a bit. He can totally believe that there are things that Signless can't tell Psiioniic, and that he can't really depend on Psiioniic's counsel, especially compared to Dualscar. And finally, he feels a great deal better]

I'm tryin' to get along wwith him. He's been comin' to me and I'vve been real kind - I swwear, as kind as I knoww howw to be. But it's not an easy thing for him to forgivve, I'm sure. He told me he hates me.

[withoutasign]

[Signless picks up on the change in Dualscar's mood, and he relaxes a little more himself.]

I know you are, and I really appreciate that. But.... hmmmmm.

[Pause]

Do you hate him back?

[devwocean]

No.

[The answer is without hesitation, and calm. He can't imagine Psiioniic as a rival to him. There's no way that Psiioniic could challenge him the way a kismesis must. And honestly, Psiioniic hasn't done anything to inspire hatred in Dualscar]

[withoutasign]

I didn't think so.

[Still, Signless is relieved. He didn't fancy having to find an auspitice for the two of them.]

I'll talk to him about this. I know you're making an effort to get along, and he needs to meet you halfway.

[devwocean]

[Dualscar huffs a little, his gills glubbing softly] Maybe hatin' me is a good thing for him, evven if it's not returned. Hate is somethin' trolls do. It's a selfish feeling.

[withoutasign]

It's selfish, but it's destructive. [Signless shrugs helplessly.] Sometimes, I really don't know how to help him.

[devwocean]

It may not be destructivve if it reminds him howw to feel somethin' for himself instead a just on behalf a someone he servves, or you. [Very quietly] But you're not the only one wwho doesn't knoww howw to fix him. Maybe he can't be helped. Wwhat's happened to him is beyond compare.

[withoutasign]

[Signless breathes in, a choked little gasp, and hides his face in Dualscar's chest. He starts shaking all over.]

He has to get better... he has to...

[devwocean]

[He stiffens and cuddles Signless tightly, shooshing him and stroking his hair]

Don't... don't do this. He has already started improvvin', but wwhen you havve expectations that he can't fulfil, then you hurt both a you. He'll nevver be wwho he wwas, but he wwill be better.

[withoutasign]

[That should be comforting. Normally, it would be. But it has been a long week, a stressful week, and Signless has reached his breaking point.]

[He slumps against Dualscar, and even though he's very quiet about it, it's obvious that he's crying.]

It's all my fault... what happened to him is all my fault...

[devwocean]

[Fuck, that wasn't what Dualscar intended. He stiffens like a deer in headlights, then hastens to cuddle and stroke him, though he already was.]

No, no it wwasn't. It wwas my fault, o-our fault. The fault a Her an all a the highbloods wwho wwanted to keep their powwer an keep you dowwn. It wwasn't your fault at all!

[withoutasign]

It was.

[Signless is prepared to be insistent about this.]

I knew what he was, I knew what happened to trolls like him in the Empire... I just... I just never thought... I thought he would die before he'd let himself be captured...

[He hides his face, actively sobbing now.]

S-sometimes, I... I think it would be better... if he had died...

[devwocean]

[Dualscar's arms tighten around him and he rocks in place, making awkward, reassuring noises. He fully believes that Signless is right - dying would have been a mercy]

But...but here he can livve a happy life. Maybe not a normal or perfect one, but still, it can be good. He seems happy enough, uh, most a the time, so you don't need to glub so much...

[withoutasign]

[Sorry, Dualscar, Signless just needs to cry himself out now, and that's exactly what he's going to do, staining the front of Dualscar's shirt and the water in the spa red.]

[devwocean]

[And Dualscar is just going to go on desperately and helplessly trying to comfort him until he's cried all of his tears]

[withoutasign]

[Whether Dualscar realizes it or not, his awkward comfort helps Signless calm down, and he stops crying after a few minutes, his sobs trickling away into sniffling and then silence.]

Sorry.